for THE JOURNEY
You are dreamers, artisans, and difference-makers. You are creatives, entrepreneurs, and adventurers. You are believers in the world’s best future. Welcome to our community blog.
According to the Strengths Finder 2.0 (of which I am a huge fan), my top strength is Achiever. So when a day goes by where I haven’t achieved all of the things that I set out to do in a day, I have a hard time feeling like I have accomplished anything at all. This tends to be a problem for me because as the cofounder of a small, but growing organization, I know what it is like to have an entire day go by and to be left wondering where all of my time went! At the end of the day, even if I’ve been productive and I’ve clearly made progress in several small areas, if I spent very little time executing on my primary objectives it can feel defeating.
There’s a not so subtle voice that wells up inside of me more often than I’d like to admit. It’s the ugly voice of comparison. This voice leads to one of two problematic feelings for me: inferiority or superiority. Because the truth about comparison is that it goes both ways. It’s the voice that says what I do doesn’t matter, because someone else is doing something better. It is the voice that minimizes what others do because I don’t see the value in it or understand it. It’s the voice that tells me I don’t have anything to offer because I don’t have everything together. It’s the voice that also says I don’t need to feel too bad about my shortcomings, because at least I’m not quite as much of a mess as so-and-so. But today I’d like to boldly declare, regardless of what it says, the voice of comparison is a liar.
One of my favorite movies is Disney’s “The Kid”. In the scene where big Russ is trying to explain his job as an image consultant and little Rusty is trying to understand what that means, he looks up and in a childish, drawn out tone says, “But what do I doooo?”
This very phrase and in Rusty’s tone went through my head about 1,000 times as we started exploring re-articulating our mission statement. I was newly hired as the Executive Director of Mika Community Development Corporation but had been a part of the organization for 11 of our 12 years. Our work wasn’t changing but we needed to clarify and focus the most core part of our work, our mission.
You started something! That’s a big deal. Whether you’ve been at it for awhile or you are just starting out, you might find yourself exploring the idea of moving to your own office space. Next step…secure a lease, right? Maybe not.
We’ve asked a few of the members that work out Wayfare full time why they have chosen to have their offices and build their team inside of the a shared workspace environment rather than in their own private office space. A few main themes came up: The Community, The Flexibility, and Business Opportunities.
I’ve heard it said that if there is a choice to be right or be kind, choose kindness. I love this sentiment and often encourage my kids (and myself for that matter) to think in this way. But in reality, don’t both matter? Truth without kindness tends to fall on deaf ears, and kindness without truth really isn’t kind, its flattery. True kindness comes from a desire for the best possible outcome for everyone involved. This usually entails working together. Not just tolerating someone who is occupying space in close proximity to you, but actually doing work in cooperation with one another.
From people on your team at work, to people you rub shoulders with in a shared workspace (yay coworking!), to working with and advocating on behalf of others, working together is important. As we identify needs and consider how to help, it often means working with people who are different than us. This could mean working with the person or people responsible for the problem you are trying to solve. It could mean joining someone very different than you who feels called to the same work. It could mean working to keep relationships in tact even when we disagree on a lot. We all encounter moments when differences come to the surface and we need to work together to make progress.
If working together is important, how do we accomplish the important work? These two phrases may help.
Today we’re hearing from Anna Kennedy from Mika CDC whose mission is to build whole relationships in Costa Mesa. One way they’re doing this is through Language Learning Nights hosted by Wayfare Costa Mesa.
If you’re anything like me, you talk about practicing your Spanish more than you actually find time to do it. For many people, it’s been since high school, which, is getting further and further away. Our lives are busy and sometimes it’s hard to figure out a time to practice a foreign language.
The same applies for many of our native Spanish speaking neighbors here in Costa Mesa. Because of this, Mika recently launched Language Learning Night.
It’s a new year and we have big news. We started dreaming about what Wayfare would become over three years ago. It was our vision to create a workspace and support for organizations that would birth movements for the common good.
As we were forming the organization, we decided on the name Wayfare because it captured the heart behind our vision. The word Wayfare has a double meaning. It means the act of journeying. It also means provisions for the journey. This word clearly encompassed the community we envisioned—a community of creators, doers, and adventurers aspiring to pursue the common good and support each other in the journey.
Lots of people are saying 2016 was one of the worst years, and so they are looking at 2017 with hope, excitement and lots of plans to make big changes. I don’t know if 2016 was my worst year, but it was for sure my busiest. During overwhelming times like these, my dad says, “Life can feel like trying to drink out of fire hose. It all just comes at once and you feel like you may drown.” I was drowning this year! This year I was tasked with restarting a church that had experienced a huge decline and I published my first book where I was the primary author. The project included art, video and writing. So it was a crazy year where every other day I thought I was going under. Let alone feeling like I had a personal life.
I’ve been pondering the concept of legacy a lot lately. Perhaps because I just had my second daughter-and I’m overly intentional about the words that come out of my mouth towards and about them. I want every day, every moment, to be wrapped around intention because, truth is, girls still need to hear that they can and should do the hard and holy things in the world.
There’s another side to legacy that drives me. My mom. She is not my hero. No, the complete opposite. Her life was an example of everything I never want to be-selfish, addict, abusive, promiscuous…lost. My birth mom raised me to fear the world, fear her hand, fear her words. She made me believe my worth is in my sexuality and I’m only as good as the attention I received from guys. To go to college, to have a life long spouse, to do better for myself, well, this was selfish and wrong and I obviously thought I was better than everyone for doing so.
This year has been one of chaos, of change, of newness. I graduated college. Got engaged. New Job. Moved. Marriage. Bliss. Chaos.
With the beauty and the gift that change is, I’m never prepared for the grief that it’s paired with. Transition melts you and reforms you to where you feel like a piece of playdough that a 3-year old pancake-smashed, mixed with other colors, and stuck on the bottom of a desk. I almost don’t recognize myself.